So here’s me, doing the responsible thing and trying to get my taxes filed.
Accountant #1: To be honest, you can’t really afford my $300 dollar fee, why not just go to H&R block and have them do it?
Later that week at H&R:
H&R Block Accountant: [looking over my W-2] Hmmm, this doesn’t look so good.
Me: “What doesn’t look so good?”
H&R: “You’re single?”
H&R: You don’t have any kids?!
H&R: No kids at all! How about a mortage? Or any sort of loan? Childcare?
H&R: Then you’re screwed. No tax credits for you. In fact, you may even owe the government money. There’s no luck for you singles.
Me: So you’re telling me that because I don’t have any kids and aren’t married, I’m basically screwed?
H&R: Yes, singles get totally screwed when it comes to doing their taxes. Don’t even bother filing with us. Just go online and do it for free. You can’t afford to pay me $130 when you may not even get anything back.
Me: [Silent.] Well, thanks for being so honest.
H&R: No problem.